On Being in the Right Place at the Right Time because it is the Right Thing

This thought has been going through my mind today in, (of course) an odd way.

Lately things have been hard. I will be honest and say that most of the time when my life is the very worst no one ever knows it. I am actually a very private person about certain things in my life and that is great but sometimes it causes me problems also. When I say hard I mean considering quitting my job, not doing summer school, and moving somewhere else. So let's get started with the reason for this post eh?

When I came to Utah State University as a young freshmen learning all about how to be an ambassador we were once having a serious conversation that mirrored kind of what a testimony was like, things like "when I was in the library on this day, I knew I was supposed to be here," and also things like "I will never be able to feel this way about any other University because I know this is the right one for me." You following what I am saying? It is almost like utahsinlges.com meets singles ward. HA! I rolled my eyes so hard when I heard things like this that my brain stopped working. But I will be honest there was a time last semester when I was walking to my class, about fifteen minutes late, it had been a bad morning, and I was just worn out, and I was walking towards the business building when the sun just shone down right on the mountains and I thought distinctly "I'm supposed to be here." I know that seems weird and I thought so too, but at the time I was seriously considering dropping out of school. Now I understand that feeling. I am so excited about my major and my minor now that I cannot imagine not being here. I was in the right place at the right time and now I am able to have the right thing for me.

Another one, my job, I really enjoy my job. I think I say that a lot on here which is funny because I literally sometimes feel like i'm going to have a panic attack because of my job. Love/Hate relationship I guess. A few weeks ago though I was in a class and I was discussing with a friend some different options because I am worried about finances when Drew gets home with him going to school and two cars and more insurance and food, etc etc, and I said that I was thinking about trying to find another job. The girl sitting next to us turned to me shocked and said "But you love your job!!" This is funny/ironic A. because that girl was soooo eavesdropping. B. because that girl does not know me at all. and C. because it is true that I love my job very much and I always used examples in that class of what I had learned at my job. Later this week I went to work and since I had been visiting the Hubster I had been gone for a while. I know the majority but there are a few that are my "specials" for one reason or another I just feel like they need to be taken care of. I was struck up in the middle of a conversation with one of them and he said "I have missed you! I can't imagine what it would be like if I came and you weren't here to bring the sunshine to my day!" (heart. melted. 70+ is the greatest age a man can be right???)

I was talking to one of my very closest friends and we were discussing life. She still lives in beautiful Boise which I miss so much. I miss so many people. I miss my old life. I miss the familiarity of living there and driving and just knowing things there. We then were discussing different friends and what is going on with people and I was struck again with how deeply I need to be where I am. If I wasn't here and had stayed at home, even though I love it so much, I would be missing out on the right thing for me.

Although it is a bittersweet feeling it is also somewhat reassuring to know that even though there have been times recently that I have felt like I can't get out of bed, that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing.  That is all.

                          I am grateful for His reassurance when I need Him there the most.



Night.
xo

M